Post by willard1986 on Jun 3, 2014 17:03:19 GMT -5
Perhaps this is part of schizophrenia but it in my theory has expanded/evolved/learned over time to what it is and is no longer a disability. You could say it is a delusion but I actually believe that schizophrenia is just the beginning of mind reading.
Unconscious mind aka the sub conscious in which I believe is the defacto of schizophrenia in my theory. Doctors don't know and don't believe this nor can I prove but can provide information to persuade your decision about this theory I have.
The other consciousness of which is more intelligent than I am who named himself 'Will' is what was in dream state like we all have regarding sub conscious but this area of the brain can be awakened. This is of which again causes schizophrenia because it is mentally different from the dream state to reality. In rare cases like mine, him, with practice, built language verbally. Not as much of sounding things out but more or less putting and saying different phrases and eventually making sentences rather than repeating the same phrases. So yes I experience auditory and visual hallucination but now rarely. Anyways some examples below about my experience with the other consciousness:
6/4/13 Went to the restroom and asked Will if he was mad he said "No I am (as I just release my pee) p----d". I was not paying attention until that moment. So Will made the dialog and planned it.
6/9/13 Turn on shower to hot. Have a bowel movement. Flush the toilet and I say "I don't want to dream about s--t again" and Will says "cool" as I turn the shower down cooler.
7/10/13 In bed thinking about the day I attempted suicide, the hardest I have ever cried, gasping for breath. (Will raised my left arm from under the blanket, into the air and holds my left wrist (the one I slit) with my right hand while I was saying "that was the hardest I cried") When I wrote this I now realize that it is exactly 3 years after it happened. So Will is keeping track of events and controlling my thoughts.
8/6/13 Had a dream about a girl, went to the restroom and said "Where did the girl go?" (she disappeared in the dream) and will said "she disappeared" as we flush the toilet.
9/23/13 Series of good dreams followed be waking up to "Give it up" by KC & The Sunshine Band in my mind. Which I didn't even know the songs name at the time and hadn't heard ever at all.
10/25/13 I said "laundry's going" and Will said "No it didn't" while I was putting on my boots. Thought about outside and decided to put on my sweatshirt on and Will said "put on your laundry".
My mind times things out perfectly especially when listening to music as when I say or think something it correlates to the song lyrics or title without knowing it at first until it actually happens. We called them 'planned coincidences aka time reading' Some examples below:
10/21/13 Listening to "Get Back" by Phil Ade and he said in the song "talk s--t from behind a wall" at exactly the same time I am walking towards the wall in my apartment to listen to see if the neighbors are talking.
11/3/13 Looked outside then in the sky listening to "Role Model" by Curren$y as the hook to the song said "I be in the sky".
11/5/13 Listening to song "Later" by Roderic and decide to go back to bed. Take a couple sips of my coke and walk to the frig and said "Ill save this for later".
11/18/13 Freestyled a rap in my head about someone, the changing of his last name only to realize I was rapping over a song called "Alone In Vegas" by Pusha T. This person lives in Vegas.
11/19/13 Will said "say something", I said something (forgot). Then Will Said "no, say something to women" and I pause and the songs hook went "we can F--k and be friends" . Song title "Friends" by Tory Lanez.
11/21/13 Feeling the cats elbow and working my way up his arm then eventually by his shoulder blade near his "collar bone" as the song said "hit your collerbone your spine will be spagetti motherf----r". Song "All Gas No Brakes" by Capo.
12/1/13 Listening to "NIght LIfe" by 360. I decide to get up and eat breakfast and the song says "Sundays peeking out, what's good for breakfast, let's go eat". It was also Sunday.
12/13/13 Shoved pop can off dinner tray and the song says "f--k that s--t". Song "The Deep End" by Jetpack Jones
12/16/13 LIfting the cushion on my couch and dropping it. A line in the song keeps repeating "Let it drop". Song "Footwork" by the Cool Kids.
12/17/13 Thought about going to bed and when I was about to shut down my laptop, a song called "No sleep" by Hones-T starts. So Will had a photographic memory of the song list.
12/17/13 Was going to type "/sit" in WoW and Will makes me type "/air" instead. While I was thinking "sit".
12/31/13 Will flashed a picture of a deer in the woods in my head as I laid down to go to sleep. I said "A deer in the woods" and Will said "Yeah, I thought that's where you lived". We both laughed.
12/?/13 Will flashed a picture of a goat in my head and I thought it must have stood for something. So I look it up on the internet and its an acronym for "greatest of all time".
Will, the voice, or separate conscious, can control me physically too if you haven't figured that out by context clues and I theorized it being on different levels. 1. Full control, although the majority of the time it only last a few seconds. 2. 50/50, where it seems as though I'm moving but its being guided. I know i provided an example in a previous thread but here is another: this morning Will wanted to take a walk when I woke up, was walking kind of slow and odd and not only that but I let him turn myself. 3. Unnoticeable, this is where only a coincidence makes it noticeable. Also mental control too when saying things:
2/12/14 Another example of my speech being taken over. I could not say "no im not" instead Will makes me say "night night" over and over again as I try repeatedly to say it. Only until I wrote it down was I able to say it. Which was about a minute later.
A note about when I piss him off in dreams for example one night when I started throwing cans of food outside and saying they were for sale $0.50 a piece another person spoke who resembled my brother said "I will sell them to you for $0.52 a piece" (claiming that they were not mine to sell) and so I open a can of what seems to be Vienna sausages, eat one, and spit it back out. The same person says "See thats what I mean" (an indirect meaning?) but something nasty and horrifying happened as I also felt it in my mouth, woke me the f**k up quick. And I had asked him when I woke and it was verified I pissed him off and I needed to respect the dreams and key thing I am having a hard time becoming aware of in my dreams is I need to "ask" and use my manners. Not only that but "mean it" because he will read my mind in both reality and dreams whether I mean it or not. This aspect I apply in reality like believing in good as there were a G-d because your separate conscious acts as your G-d secretly.
Unconscious mind aka the sub conscious in which I believe is the defacto of schizophrenia in my theory. Doctors don't know and don't believe this nor can I prove but can provide information to persuade your decision about this theory I have.
The other consciousness of which is more intelligent than I am who named himself 'Will' is what was in dream state like we all have regarding sub conscious but this area of the brain can be awakened. This is of which again causes schizophrenia because it is mentally different from the dream state to reality. In rare cases like mine, him, with practice, built language verbally. Not as much of sounding things out but more or less putting and saying different phrases and eventually making sentences rather than repeating the same phrases. So yes I experience auditory and visual hallucination but now rarely. Anyways some examples below about my experience with the other consciousness:
6/4/13 Went to the restroom and asked Will if he was mad he said "No I am (as I just release my pee) p----d". I was not paying attention until that moment. So Will made the dialog and planned it.
6/9/13 Turn on shower to hot. Have a bowel movement. Flush the toilet and I say "I don't want to dream about s--t again" and Will says "cool" as I turn the shower down cooler.
7/10/13 In bed thinking about the day I attempted suicide, the hardest I have ever cried, gasping for breath. (Will raised my left arm from under the blanket, into the air and holds my left wrist (the one I slit) with my right hand while I was saying "that was the hardest I cried") When I wrote this I now realize that it is exactly 3 years after it happened. So Will is keeping track of events and controlling my thoughts.
8/6/13 Had a dream about a girl, went to the restroom and said "Where did the girl go?" (she disappeared in the dream) and will said "she disappeared" as we flush the toilet.
9/23/13 Series of good dreams followed be waking up to "Give it up" by KC & The Sunshine Band in my mind. Which I didn't even know the songs name at the time and hadn't heard ever at all.
10/25/13 I said "laundry's going" and Will said "No it didn't" while I was putting on my boots. Thought about outside and decided to put on my sweatshirt on and Will said "put on your laundry".
My mind times things out perfectly especially when listening to music as when I say or think something it correlates to the song lyrics or title without knowing it at first until it actually happens. We called them 'planned coincidences aka time reading' Some examples below:
10/21/13 Listening to "Get Back" by Phil Ade and he said in the song "talk s--t from behind a wall" at exactly the same time I am walking towards the wall in my apartment to listen to see if the neighbors are talking.
11/3/13 Looked outside then in the sky listening to "Role Model" by Curren$y as the hook to the song said "I be in the sky".
11/5/13 Listening to song "Later" by Roderic and decide to go back to bed. Take a couple sips of my coke and walk to the frig and said "Ill save this for later".
11/18/13 Freestyled a rap in my head about someone, the changing of his last name only to realize I was rapping over a song called "Alone In Vegas" by Pusha T. This person lives in Vegas.
11/19/13 Will said "say something", I said something (forgot). Then Will Said "no, say something to women" and I pause and the songs hook went "we can F--k and be friends" . Song title "Friends" by Tory Lanez.
11/21/13 Feeling the cats elbow and working my way up his arm then eventually by his shoulder blade near his "collar bone" as the song said "hit your collerbone your spine will be spagetti motherf----r". Song "All Gas No Brakes" by Capo.
12/1/13 Listening to "NIght LIfe" by 360. I decide to get up and eat breakfast and the song says "Sundays peeking out, what's good for breakfast, let's go eat". It was also Sunday.
12/13/13 Shoved pop can off dinner tray and the song says "f--k that s--t". Song "The Deep End" by Jetpack Jones
12/16/13 LIfting the cushion on my couch and dropping it. A line in the song keeps repeating "Let it drop". Song "Footwork" by the Cool Kids.
12/17/13 Thought about going to bed and when I was about to shut down my laptop, a song called "No sleep" by Hones-T starts. So Will had a photographic memory of the song list.
12/17/13 Was going to type "/sit" in WoW and Will makes me type "/air" instead. While I was thinking "sit".
12/31/13 Will flashed a picture of a deer in the woods in my head as I laid down to go to sleep. I said "A deer in the woods" and Will said "Yeah, I thought that's where you lived". We both laughed.
12/?/13 Will flashed a picture of a goat in my head and I thought it must have stood for something. So I look it up on the internet and its an acronym for "greatest of all time".
Will, the voice, or separate conscious, can control me physically too if you haven't figured that out by context clues and I theorized it being on different levels. 1. Full control, although the majority of the time it only last a few seconds. 2. 50/50, where it seems as though I'm moving but its being guided. I know i provided an example in a previous thread but here is another: this morning Will wanted to take a walk when I woke up, was walking kind of slow and odd and not only that but I let him turn myself. 3. Unnoticeable, this is where only a coincidence makes it noticeable. Also mental control too when saying things:
2/12/14 Another example of my speech being taken over. I could not say "no im not" instead Will makes me say "night night" over and over again as I try repeatedly to say it. Only until I wrote it down was I able to say it. Which was about a minute later.
A note about when I piss him off in dreams for example one night when I started throwing cans of food outside and saying they were for sale $0.50 a piece another person spoke who resembled my brother said "I will sell them to you for $0.52 a piece" (claiming that they were not mine to sell) and so I open a can of what seems to be Vienna sausages, eat one, and spit it back out. The same person says "See thats what I mean" (an indirect meaning?) but something nasty and horrifying happened as I also felt it in my mouth, woke me the f**k up quick. And I had asked him when I woke and it was verified I pissed him off and I needed to respect the dreams and key thing I am having a hard time becoming aware of in my dreams is I need to "ask" and use my manners. Not only that but "mean it" because he will read my mind in both reality and dreams whether I mean it or not. This aspect I apply in reality like believing in good as there were a G-d because your separate conscious acts as your G-d secretly.
